Sunday, August 07, 2011
Monday, June 06, 2011
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Why do divorces cost so much? They're worth it!!
So after having been divorced 2 times, I have a very simple bit of advice for all people getting ready to go through a divorce.
“Get a Local Divorce Lawyer, and put up a big retainer, like the kind that hurts you to talk about.”
Reasons;
#1. While any old Lawyer can handle your case, a divorce lawyer knows a lot more about the specific goings on in their local court system for divorce. What forms have to be filed when, and what documents you will need to turn over when.
During my last divorce it became very obvious that my former wife got a General Attorney and that I had a Divorce Lawyer. My Lawyer was so on top of things that the other Attorney looked like a dumb ass to the court over and over again, honestly I felt bad for the poor guy because he would ask for things we had already sent over, and turned in stuff late because he was flying by the seat of his pants, and he was really doing that badly, yet my lawyer was so on top of things that when I went on deployment we kept the case going so I did not have to waste time waiting for it to be over before moving on with my life.
#2. The bigger the retainer the, the better the Lawyer/Attorney should be..
During my first divorce I got the guy local to my Father’s house to start the case, and ended up moving to another Attorney closer to the end because of how much more it would have cost me for the first guy to drive all over the state, and it took forever, like the better part of almost 3 years. During the 2nd divorce it was very quick, in fact so much so that I was divorced right after my 2nd adversary of my wedding date.
I know it’s expensive, but when the only way to be healthy, and move on with your life is a divorce, don’t cut corners.
“Get a Local Divorce Lawyer, and put up a big retainer, like the kind that hurts you to talk about.”
Reasons;
#1. While any old Lawyer can handle your case, a divorce lawyer knows a lot more about the specific goings on in their local court system for divorce. What forms have to be filed when, and what documents you will need to turn over when.
During my last divorce it became very obvious that my former wife got a General Attorney and that I had a Divorce Lawyer. My Lawyer was so on top of things that the other Attorney looked like a dumb ass to the court over and over again, honestly I felt bad for the poor guy because he would ask for things we had already sent over, and turned in stuff late because he was flying by the seat of his pants, and he was really doing that badly, yet my lawyer was so on top of things that when I went on deployment we kept the case going so I did not have to waste time waiting for it to be over before moving on with my life.
#2. The bigger the retainer the, the better the Lawyer/Attorney should be..
During my first divorce I got the guy local to my Father’s house to start the case, and ended up moving to another Attorney closer to the end because of how much more it would have cost me for the first guy to drive all over the state, and it took forever, like the better part of almost 3 years. During the 2nd divorce it was very quick, in fact so much so that I was divorced right after my 2nd adversary of my wedding date.
I know it’s expensive, but when the only way to be healthy, and move on with your life is a divorce, don’t cut corners.
Tuesday, November 29, 2005
Meeting People..
You know, I think back and I realize that no matter how hard I try I almost always come across as an angry white boy when I meet people, and its so not true. Or I go out to see people when I am not feeling well or things in the world are all screaming at me to stay home..
It happens a lot more than I would like to admit.
Most of the time I get so caught up in the greatness of who I am and what I know that I forget the little fact that for all I know, I still do not know everything, and in the scope of the leather universe I am an idiot (an I-D-10-T if you forgive my military lingo).
Is that a Zen statement?
I do not think so, what I think is I know that no matter how good a Top I think I am, I still have things I would like to learn and things I need to know.
That no matter what I know there always are thing’s I don’t know.
Other people are some of those things.
And even if I think I know some one, sometimes people surprise you, and end up being some one you brushed off who you really would have liked to known better.
There is a person who my roommates know really well, to whom a fuck is basically her way of shaking your hand. When I first meet her back in San Diego she was working the counter of a coffee shop where one of the local leather events was going on she was kind and generally nice and I brushed her off because I was their to meet the leather community, not some little coffee shop girl.. WOW, did I fuck that up bad.. She is actually a great person who for other reasons (all things I did), would (for the most part) rather not talk to me.
Or more recently, I was at a vender fair and I mouthed off to a person behind a counter who I had no idea who she was. I have talked to her a good bunch of times from that one to the current time, and realized that; A. she is a lot nicer person than I am, B. she has no idea that was me, or C. she has forgotten the whole matter?
Strangely, my looks change on some level in a way that people see me all the time, and yet they don’t see me? I don’t know how to explain it except some sort of Superman/Clark Kent ability?
In leathers I look like X, in dance clothes I look like Y, and in plain clothes I look like Z. And then you add the glasses on/glasses off and people have no idea who I am, or if my hair gets too long (I should really go back to getting it cut every other week) people just do not recognize me.
It’s a blessing and a curse.
On some level people get to know me before they get to make a real choice about who I am.
I am a white boy, with 21 years of his life on a shelf that no matter how tight I try to keep the bottle closed and ignore my emotions some how they leak out. Its something I am, learning to deal with, but its not who I am?
But as the quote from Mother Night (1996) (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0117093/) Says:
Howard W. Campbell Jr.: I guess the moral here is: you must be careful what you pretend to be because in the end you are who you're pretending to be.
It happens a lot more than I would like to admit.
Most of the time I get so caught up in the greatness of who I am and what I know that I forget the little fact that for all I know, I still do not know everything, and in the scope of the leather universe I am an idiot (an I-D-10-T if you forgive my military lingo).
Is that a Zen statement?
I do not think so, what I think is I know that no matter how good a Top I think I am, I still have things I would like to learn and things I need to know.
That no matter what I know there always are thing’s I don’t know.
Other people are some of those things.
And even if I think I know some one, sometimes people surprise you, and end up being some one you brushed off who you really would have liked to known better.
There is a person who my roommates know really well, to whom a fuck is basically her way of shaking your hand. When I first meet her back in San Diego she was working the counter of a coffee shop where one of the local leather events was going on she was kind and generally nice and I brushed her off because I was their to meet the leather community, not some little coffee shop girl.. WOW, did I fuck that up bad.. She is actually a great person who for other reasons (all things I did), would (for the most part) rather not talk to me.
Or more recently, I was at a vender fair and I mouthed off to a person behind a counter who I had no idea who she was. I have talked to her a good bunch of times from that one to the current time, and realized that; A. she is a lot nicer person than I am, B. she has no idea that was me, or C. she has forgotten the whole matter?
Strangely, my looks change on some level in a way that people see me all the time, and yet they don’t see me? I don’t know how to explain it except some sort of Superman/Clark Kent ability?
In leathers I look like X, in dance clothes I look like Y, and in plain clothes I look like Z. And then you add the glasses on/glasses off and people have no idea who I am, or if my hair gets too long (I should really go back to getting it cut every other week) people just do not recognize me.
It’s a blessing and a curse.
On some level people get to know me before they get to make a real choice about who I am.
I am a white boy, with 21 years of his life on a shelf that no matter how tight I try to keep the bottle closed and ignore my emotions some how they leak out. Its something I am, learning to deal with, but its not who I am?
But as the quote from Mother Night (1996) (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0117093/) Says:
Howard W. Campbell Jr.: I guess the moral here is: you must be careful what you pretend to be because in the end you are who you're pretending to be.
Sunday, November 20, 2005
The Big times…
I have Live Journal’ed my tail end off and after a good bunch of years, and I think I am ready to write a journal that is free of my Drama..
Only time will tell.
Some times I am 32 going on 18 and other times I am 32 going on 75, I guess its all a matter of perspective. This one will be mine.
Only time will tell.
Some times I am 32 going on 18 and other times I am 32 going on 75, I guess its all a matter of perspective. This one will be mine.
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